Uncle Pete – A

Seems Jeremy gave his nephew Andrew a box Magic Tricks as a Christmas present. Andrew opened it up, and asked Jeremy to help him master some of the tricks. Among the tricks was a miniature guillotine.
Uncle Pete picked it up and decided to play with it. No sense in reading the directions, he was an adult, and this was a childs toy. He set it on top of a box, stuck his pointy finger in the slot, raised his other hand high, and was about to smack the blade down.
Just before he did so, Andrew’s Mom shouted, “Uncle Pete! Maybe you should try it with a baby carrot first!”
“Pashaw!” Uncle Pete exclaimed. “I know what I’m doing.”
But due to family pressure, he reluctantly replaced his finger with a baby carrot.
Then proceeded with his trick.
Down came the blade.
And the two halves of the baby carrot flew to either end of the room.